A Hard Start to a Better Day

The day started out about 5am with Adalyn running into our room.  She was yelling, "Daddy, daddy, I am worried about you."  James asked why she was worried.  Adalyn responded that James "was cooking in the kitchen and then washed his hands and then went outside and was dying."  James asked if she meant drying, like that he was drying his hands.  She said, "No, dying. You were dying."  It was so sad, I was crying.  James talked to her for a few minutes and reassured her he wasn't dying.  She spent an hour or so in our bed then went back to bed.  I asked her about it in the morning.  I asked her what her dad was cooking in the dream (in hopes that she had forgotten the dream and wouldn't know what I was talking about) and she told me the dream again.  With tears in my eyes, I explained that like Grandma Wood, when people die they go to live with Heavenly Father and that we will get to live with them again.  I told her that her Dad was very sick and the doctors were working to help him feel better, but that he was not going to die for a long time.  And, that when he did die, we could see him again.  I don't know how to help a not-quite-three-year-old understand life and death.  I have never talked to her about the possibility of James dying.  I have no idea where it came from, but it is just one more sign of just how stressful this experience is for her.  This is just so hard!

James is feeling better today.  He was up for a few hours yesterday and up for a few more today.  He is tired and dealing with discomforts of chemo, but overall in better spirits today.  James was able to enjoy some time with the girls today.  Adalyn enjoyed quiet-time laying beside him today.  James is hoping to be able to work some of these first few days of the week.  Needless to say, it is hard to believe it is a chemo week already.  

We were able to watch some of General Conference and listen to the leaders of our church today.  We were especially touched listening to the Prophet encourage people to help their neighbors and those in need.  Being on the receiving end of countless kind deeds, warm meals, and prayers, we just want to thank everyone who has given so generously to our family in this, our great time of need.  Words cannot express our gratitude.  Thank you!